What's your PR?

A "PR" in the wellness world means "Personal Record."

Last Sunday was my half marathon. Since I have never run a half marathon, I certainly set a PR. But as my friend Kirke most eloquently put it the morning of the race, this PR was "Personal Reason."

What was my PR?

I had intended to run this race alone. I have been training since October with that in mind. 95% of my training runs for the past 5 months have been alone. I was used to that, I found success in that, I became accustomed to that.

About a week before the race, my partner Julie said "I think we should run the half together." I immediately did the whole "thanks but no thanks" thing because, to be honest, I have always done things alone. I was used to that, I found success in that, I became accustomed to that.

You see, she is much faster than me. She has done half marathons before. LOTS of them. And full marathons before. She is a hare. I am a tortoise. So when we talked about it again, I still wasn't convinced.

Here is my PR: sure, I lost 125 pounds while training to run those 13 miles. But that's not it. I have faced the biggest beast that has made my world increasingly smaller. But that's not it. I had the courage to finally come out and tell my story to a world of peers that think being gay AND christian isn't a thing. But that's not it either.

My PR is that I don't have to run this race alone. Not this one, not the next one, not the metaphorical one, none of them.

I have had some amazing conversations with people since coming out. I have had friends that love Jesus tell me that their God doesn't accept my lifestyle, and I have had friends that love Jesus tell me how proud they are of me. I have had people tell me that watching me come out has given them courage to be more loving to the gay Christian community. I have had people tell me that we, as a society, are on a slippery slope where everything has become permissible and it has to stop.

Each conversation has been amazing because I have loved each one of those conversations individually. My friends are wrestling with what God truly believes about being a gay christian. And my story will be the only "arguing" I will ever have with them. My job is not to convince anyone of anything. My job is to try to love like

Jesus. And I can't do that alone.

So Julie and I ran those 13 miles. And it was hard. But the journey allowed me to reflect, be thankful, be emotional, and be ready for what's next. Together. Not alone. I cried when we started, and I cried when we finished. I can't believe we did it. I am so glad I checked my pride and accepted Julie's offer to run with me. She was smiling the entire time, so happy to be next to me. And to be honest, it looked effortless for her! But it was profound and meaningful, and as we crossed the finish, I knew it was just the beginning. For both of us.

Together. Not alone.