You look great! Keep going!

Me, Rich, Ryan, and Austin in a 5k back in March.

I've been doing this weight loss thing for a couple months now. I have lost enough weight that people notice. Coincidentally, I work in a place where there are a LOT of people in and out, and most of them are on a quest to get healthy. So it's a topic of conversation.

I guess it's no surprise that it's hard to take a compliment. It's hard for us to just say "thank you" when someone genuinely compliments us. The surprising thing for me is that, as I am searching for motivation every single day, I receive motivation in the form of a compliment yet my gut reaction is to reject the compliment. Here are some of the responses I have given lately:

• Thanks, but it's a slow process.
• Yeah, I have a long way to go.
• Ugh, this is only the beginning.
• I don't feel great, I didn't lose any weight this week.
• It's going to take me forever to reach my goal.

Why is it so hard for me to accept what I am looking for? I pray for motivation and God gives it to me. But instead of accepting that gift, I lessen it, I adjust it, I make it manageable for me to take in. My terms, my way, my excuses. Because, what if I don't keep going? What if I fail? What if I don't meet the goals that I set for myself? Now that people are noticing, I am on display. I can't screw it up. I don't want to be embarrassed. Did you notice how many "I" statements I just wrote in a row? Too many. Too freaking many.

It's not about me. It's not about my way. If I tried it God's way, I would be gracious. If I tried it God's way, I would be patient with myself. If I tried it God's way, I would rejoice in the small opportunity to glorify God when people ask me how I'm doing this, because I'll be honest...I have no idea how I'm doing it some days. That's how I know that someone else is in charge.

Seems like God might have a better idea of what I need than I do. So for all the people that have said kind words to me lately, thank you. Thank you, thank you. And yes, I will keep going! We all will!

-Liz