Why discipline is a dirty word

Yesterday morning, I was on the treadmill flipping through channels trying to occupy my brain while I ran. I flipped across a normally annoying Christian evangelism channel, but this time, I caught a glimpse of Beth Moore who I think is pretty awesome. Mostly because she's honest about her past and the fact that it's not something to be proud of.

The verse she was speaking on was Hebrews 12:11.

"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it."

Is it crazy that this lady was speaking to me about the importance of discipline while I was on the treadmill yet again, battling this weight thing that has limited me almost all of my life?

Yeah. But God is crazy like that.

So here's my thought on this: it sucks to get up early to go running. It really does. My bed is warm, it's dark and I am tired. It is not pleasant at the time, it is painful.

You know what else is painful? Not eating Christmas Tree Cakes like everyone else is. Not stopping at Bojangles on the way home. Not having ice cream at the end of every day. Running miles at a time, going up and down flights of stairs, getting on the bike, lifting weights, doing burpees, watching the scale go up and down and up and down. 

The battle is, in a word, painful.

It was especially painful a year ago, when I started all this and had no idea where it would take me.

Later on, however, it produced a harvest of righteousness and peace for me. I had been trained by it.

Does God care about my weight? More than I am willing to admit. I'll put it this way for you: God cares about everything that affects you and your happiness and your heart and your soul. Nothing is stupid to Him if it's important to you. Because YOU are important to HIM. And that means, everything that is wrapped up in the confusing world of what makes you...you.

Why is discipline a dirty word? Why do we avoid it when God promises that it will produce a harvest of righteousness and peace for us? I think for me, for my whole life, my response to God, when it came to my weight was "God, you can have my whole life, but this thing, THIS, I need to keep for myself. You can't have it."

My battle against discipline started years and years ago when I wanted to hold on to this one thing that has kept me sick for so long. Now I am slowly but surely reversing a life without discipline and, honestly, a life of keeping God and everyone else around me at a distance.

Don't keep stuff to yourself. I know from experience. Let people in to whatever is keeping you locked away. Peace is the thing that we are all looking for. We just can't grab it sometimes because we refuse to let go of that other thing.

Let it go.

-Liz